Thursday, October 15, 2009

Getting through it.

Something really cool ever happen to you? Like on some Harold & Kumar shit... and you know you can't tell nobody? Man, I kinda hate when that happens.....

Anywho, good morning! I never write this early. But I didn't last night because 2 of my friends and I had a movie night in my room. All 3 of us had gone through "break-ups" this week so we were all feeling some type of way. I mean, we didn't cry and have a waiting to exhale moment... but it was nice to be around people who liteweight had the same problem as me. I don't wanna talk about the shit... I don't think any of us did... but we were all just there. Its nice to have someone there feel me?

So my friend "Lovie" jokes with me that women I deal with have radar on me. I'm starting to believe her. When I wasn't single, everyone pretty much left me alone... but when I got single? Its like they coming out of the wood works! I'm not bragging because I really don't think I'm that big of a deal. I'm just telling you the truth. I had a meeting last night on the yard but a female friend of mine wanted me to go to this mixer after it was done. I really didn't want to.. She's on the eBoard of the organization that was having it so she kinda had to be there to pay for everything... So she came to the meeting and told me "I'm coming back for you..." and I couldn't properly react because the meeting was underway... but I'm like "damn, I got it like that?" like I said... ole girl was on the eBoard of this organization so she needed to be there the WHOLE time but she was willing to come back and scoop me when my meeting is over?

AND she used someone elses car to do it! I'm a woman. I know I am.. but women confuse me so bad sometimes...

But you know what REALLY sucks? I was in a room full of beautiful brown women (and men..) talking, they were buying me drinks... Everything was cool... BUT all I could think about was her. Before I walked in, I knew that any female that got in my face didn't have a chance.. and it wouldn't even be the particular female's fault... Ole girl that came and got me from my meeting is fiiiine AND has a brain... Any other time, I'd be all in her face for real...

Man, Jada Pinkett coulda walked in... ok.. Naw, nevermind.. Jada will ALWAYS be able to have my cookies... Heartbroken or not! LOL

But this whole situation is very interesting.... because my mind is fighting the hell outta my heart. I asked God to make me stop loving her... in so many ways? He said.. "Uh No.." LOL.. But my mind is doing a good job of putting things in perspective.

(Thank yall for reading, this is some self-talk.. just tryna get my mind right)

I just keep telling myself whats mine is mine and can't be taken from me.. Message! See.. you wasn't ready. LOL

Alright yall, gotta study a little then try to go get cute for my lunch date.

Song of the Day: "Whats Love (Gotta Do With it?)" -Tina Turner
the answer to that question? NOT A DAMN THING, OBVIOUSLY!


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